The most popular is Ladies Sageet where women sing special songs to the beats of Dholki. This is the last party that the bride gives her folks as a ‘maiden’. The songs range from teasing the bride to making light fun of her in laws, giving her subtle tips on married life and expressing sorrow over her leaving her parent’s house… Closely related to Ladies Sangeet are Mehendi and Chudiyaan ceremony. Chudiyaan takes place a few days before the wedding day wherein friends and sisters put red and green bangles on the bride’s wristes, signifying the start of an auspicious life for her. Mehendi is generally held one or two days before the wedding wherein the bride’s hands and feet are decorated with henna. Her friends and other female relatives also get their hands hennaed. Morning of the wedding day sees the Batna ceremony, where gramflour paste is applied on her body after which she takes a bath and wears her wedding attire. Also, the bride’s maternal uncle gives her a set of 21 red and white ivory bangles to beworn as chooda, which she continues to wear for quite some time even after the wedding.
Archive for Traditions
We seriously keep the Lord Jesus Christ at the center of our marriage
This does not mean that we just “go to church” together, or “say grace before meals” together (although we do those things, of course!). When we are alone together, we frequently talk about the Lord, remind each other of how good He has been to us, discuss what He is doing in our lives, etc. If you listen in on our conversations, you might hear us say, “The Lord is so good to us.” Or “Thank you, Lord. You are so good!” Or, “Let me tell you about how the Lord worked out this situation for me today.” We have a brief time together each morning when we read, and briefly discuss, passages from the Bible together. (Usually we read about 10 to 20 verses from the Old Testament and 10 to 20 verses from the New Testament.) You will also hear us praying several times a day for our boys and their families, for wisdom for the day, etc. The point here is not to “brag” about our spiritual lives, but to try to illustrate what it means for Jesus to be Lord of our marriage.
Parsis
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PARSI WEDDING The Bethrotal Ceremony Next comes in a Betrothal ceremony and again the Groom’s Three or Four days before the wedding date, another ceremony The Mandav Saro is held and prayers are performed for a successful wedding. This ceremony is performed in both the places independently at the Groom’s place as well as the Bride’s place by their families. This is then followed by another ceremony called Aderni where the The Nahn Ceremony The Wedding The Groom reaches the place followed by the Bride and both of them are made to sit opposite each other and have a white cloth seperating them like a curtain between both of them with two witnesses from each side standing on both the sides. This is when the priest proceeds for the marriage ceremony by first taking in the consent of the Boy and the Girl for their preparedness and acceptance to this marriage, after which the hands of both are tied with a white thread called the dhaga, this is reffered to as Haathevaro. This is followed by another loop of the thread being tied around the couple enclosing them in a circular form symbolizing the tying of marriage knot and thus uniting them. The couple is blessed by the priest and the consent of their witnesses are asked for. Once done the couple is blessed (This blessing is called Aashirvad ) and a recital of a prayer for good health called Tan Dorosti concludes the wedding. In the Traditional way Rose petals and Rice is sprinkled over the newly weds with exchange of rings and signing of marriage certificate. Next, an unmarried sister of the bride symbolically takes milk and washes the Groom’s feet by sprinkling it and dropping of coins. The traditional food celebrating the wedding called Parsi Bhonu, is served on the leaves of the Banana plant. The Varona Ceremony On the eighth day after the wedding a ceremony called Varona is performed. The flower Garlands with other items including the food items used in the Mandav Saro ceremony are taken and slowly put in a River or Sea. It is only after this, for the first time after the wedding the Bride visits her parents house. |
Jews
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JEWISH WEDDING On early Sabbath the groom is escorted to the synagogue where he recites the Torah. once the required recitation is over the people around throw him shower him with candy and raisins. This is a customary practice to bless for a good life ahead for him and his Bride. The traditional Jewish marriage takes place in a Synagogue. It is a Traditional custom for the Groom and Bride to observe fasting on their wedding day as it is told that their previous sins are washed away and forgiven with. Thus mostly it is nearly by late noon that they get married so that the fasting period nearly covers the entire day by the time their wedding process completes. The Wedding There is a nice beautiful Canopy made from flowers and put on four poles called the CHUPPAH. The poles of the Chuppah are held by the friends of the bride and the groom. The couple stand under the Chuppah and are administered oaths and also exchange rings to mark their tie up. The traditional ring is one single piece like a band and has to have some monetary value of at least a dime (pertah). The Ketubbah is read loudly so that it is heard by all followed by a sip of wine from a wine-glass. The ceremony concludes with the groom stamping the wine glass and breaking it. ( This being a reminder of the destruction of the Holy Temple of Jerusalem ) The newly wed Bride and the Groom then proceed for home to start their new life. |
Christians
CHRISTIAN WEDDING
A wedding is defined as a sacred and important method of uniting a Man and a Woman in marital bond where they both take an oath to take care of each other in all the aspects of life including happiness and sorrows, they both shall share the situation together to face life as it comes.
The Engagement
Amidst close relatives and friends present, the Engagement takes place. The formal engagement signifies the agreement of both the Boy and the Girl to have accepted and given consent to proceed with the formalities of wedding. The boy adorning a nice suit and the girl wearing a beautiful dress make their appearance at the venue. The Boy Proposes to the Girl in the traditional manner by kneeling and asking her, for marriage. She accepts the proposal by saying ‘yes’. He presents her with a finger ring as a token of their acceptance which she accepts. The boy in a graceful manner puts on the ring on the ring finger of the girl. There is a party to enjoy the happy occasion and feasting prevails.
The Wedding
A traditional Christian marriage is solemnized by the priest in a Church. The prospective Bride is attired in a beautiful white flowing gown having her head covered by a thin white veil and she is crowned by flowers. When the Bride arrives she is welcomed and greeted with a kiss and a bouquet by the best man who is usually a person very close to the Groom. Holding her father’s arm and a bride’s maid carrying the Bride’s flowing trail behind, walk along with her towards the Altar.
The Prospective Bride and the Groom move forward towards the Altar rail standing in front of the priest. The priest gives a presentation of the couple and speaks about them and their intention. a section of the bible is read accompanied by Hymns which are sung along with the choir. There are two witnesses present from each side in front of the priest, the witnesses and the gathering, the couple declare their intention of getting married and to join themselves in holy matrimony. The couple are administered the respective wedding vows and oaths while the priest blesses the rings that they then exchange. After this is over, the Priest pronounces them as Man and Wife and this is followed by a kiss between the bride and the groom as a token of sealing their wedding vows thus concluding the main ceremony and receiving blessings from all present. The mass prayers continue for some time and the communion service takes place after which the newly wed couple signs the register and elegantly walks down the aisle, the Bride having her arm around the Groom’s arm. Gaiety marks their departure in the groom’s car and people escort them with fun till the car zooms off with a ” Just Married ” sign put behind on the car.
Sikh
The Anand Karaj – The Wedding Ceremony
The Sikh wedding is known as Anand Karaj, which translates as a Blissful Union between a man and a woman. It first starts with match making by the families of the Boy and the Girl. Sometimes the Boy and the Girl choose each other and seek the blesig of their elders for marriage. The official code of conduct of sikhs, The Reht Maryada, describes that the matrimony can be proceeded with a long a both the Boy and the Girl profess the faith of Sikhism and are permitted to be joined in wedlock in the Anand Karaj ceremony of marriage. The Reht Maryada strictly defines and forbids the dowry part and alo discourages the consultation for horoscopes and other superstitions with respect to the specific auspicious date and time of marriage.
Engagement Ceremony.
Once the Choice has been made, an Engagement ceremony called the Kurmai is called for and is mostly conducted abut a week before the wedding date, This is at home of the Boy or at The Sikh Temple the Gurudwara in the presence of the Holy book of the sikhs, the Guru Granth Sahib. When the ceremony is done at a Gurudwara, The Sikh prayer Ardas is performed followed by the chanting if the Hymns from the holy book called the Kirtans and ends with a meal for all present. This meal is called the Langer.
The Prospective Groom is presented with a Kara, a Kirpan and sweets, the Girl is presented with a nice suit dress and sweets.
The Wedding Ceremony
The wedding ceremony is initiated at a Gurudwara in the presence of The holy Book, The Guru Granth Sahib. The same can be performed at home provided the Guru Granth Sahib is properly installed as per norms where it is kept in a very clean separate room out of utmost respect and deep reverence. All sikh ceremonies center around the religious book. The wedding ceremony is specific and not performed in other places like a Hotel or Marriage halls.
The process begins with preparations at home of the groom where the family recites the Holy Book and the mother of the Boy performs the process and the boy receives a traditional ceremonial sword from his uncle. all perform the prayer Ardas and bow down before the holy book and the boy is given a mouthful of traditional sweets by his mother.
The Baraat (The group accompanying the groom) comprising of close family members and friends leave for the gurudwara singing traditional wedding songs. The sikh tradition of arriving on a horse back is arranged and so the Groom and his nephews reach the Gurudwara in a car and then the boy mounts on the horse back and reaches the door step. The Bride’s family and relatives receive the Groom welcoming him. The Ragis meanwhile perform the Kirtans and a milni ceremony is performed.
The Milni ceremony
The Milini ceremony is just before the wedding and is done at a make shift arrangement in a nicely laid out large tent like structure (shamiana) beside the gurdwara where both the families join together and exchange greetings and well wishing each other followed by tea and snacks. Garlands are exchanged with hugs and good wishes from family members and relatives. The Prospective Groom then distributes ceremonial sacramental Pudding called the Karah Parshad.
Amidst the Kirtans people start entering the Gurudwara for the beginning of the wedding. The prospective Bride makes her first appearance in public that day. In the Gurudwara Hall Men sit on side and the women sit on one side roughly equal distance from the Holy Book.
The Prospective Groom enters with his parents and cash offering is made along with a new silk covering for the holy book the Sri Guru Granth Sahib. This silk covering is called the Rumala. Awaiting the arrival of the Girl the boy sits before the holy book and listens to the holy Hymns.
The holy Book is attended by The granthi who is the caretaker of the holy book who sits in attendance of the holy book. The ceremony is normally conducted by a granthi, though it can also be performed by any respectable and learned sikh person.
The Prospective Bride arrives and is escorted by her family into the gurudwara to the place next to the groom where she sits down beside him.
The procedure begins with the officiate ascertaining that the boy and the girl are both sikhs. The couple has to stand up and so do their parents for the prayer Ardas. This Ardas indicates the consent of the public to the parties involved with respect to this marriage to proceed. The Bride and The Groom have to stand up often during this procedure and have to bow down by touching the ground with their foreheads towards the Holy book and then sit. This is out of reverence and respect. once the Ardas is completed the priest conducting the wedding speaks out the significance of marriage and the duties that bind the couple and the obligations that they need to show towards each other. The Boy and the Girl bow down before the Holy book signifying their acceptance and agreement to the guidelines and principles that they intend to follow. Next the father of the girl gets up and takes hold of the end of the scarf or the sash which is worn by the groom and takes it over the groom’s shoulder and places it in his daughter’s hands to signify that the girl now is being given in the care of her husband. This is followed by the priest reading the Lavan Hymn of the Guru Ram Das. This Hymn consists of four stanzas which describe the development of love and affection between a husband and his wife. when the Lavans are being read and at the conclusion of each one stanza the Groom and the Bride holding the end of the scarf take a clockwise round circle around the Holy Book the Sri Guru Granth Sahib. The ragis sing out the recited stanza and the couple sit down waiting for the next stanza to be read. This procedure is followed by the couple doing it a total of four times and then the couple sits down. When they walk around the Holy book the girl is morally helped by her family members to complete the rounds with her husband which is an indication of her parents support for her to join the new family.
Once the Lavan is concluded it is followed by the Anand Hymn of Guru Amar Das. This is continued by Kirtans and lectures and the ceremony is concluded by the total people present standing up for the final Ardas prayer. The Holy Book is then opened randomly and the Hymn on the page that comes open is read out signifying as the day’s order from the holy Guru for this particular occasion. This is called the Hukamnama, after which the ceremonial sacramental pudding called the Karah Parshad is given out and distributed to all present to mark the end formal of the ceremony.
The parents of the Groom and the Bride congratulate the newly weds. The visitors and guests line up to congratulate them, wish them well and offer them gifts and presents. The newly weds are escorted to the community dining hall and sit on the floor with all the guests to eat the traditional Wedding meal called the Langer. This is followed by further celebrations at home and outside over nice banquets depending upon the convenience and decision of the family of the couple.
MUSLIM
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TRADITIONAL MUSLIM WEDDING A Marriage is defined as a contract between two people , a man and a woman. This contract outlines the oath taken to spend their lives together as life partners, binding them to take care of each other in all ups and downs of life sharing their life of happiness and love. This contract is executed in the presence of witnesses and elders so that the social norm is fulfilled. The brides’ father or guardian represents the bride as the main witness. The Muslim rule significantly involves the payment of MEHR ( dower ) This is an amount in cash or kind which is agreed upon by consent of the presenting parties of the two sides making the husband liable to pay the same to the bride at the time of wedding. However this may differ if by mutual consent it is paid later on. The marriage contract unlike in olden days, is now being written down and held appropriate and valid in the eyes of the law acts as a secure way of getting married. This infect helps to pave way for handling future formalities in a better way as well as be valid in all respects. Certain norms with traditional and cultural procedures are followed in the Muslim weddings. In order to have their testimony binding in a Muslim wedding, both the prospective Groom and Bride need to be Muslims.
Rasam Ceremony (The engagement) The Engagement ceremony is called the Mangni ( the asking of hand and finalizing the same as confirmed ) This Mangni ceremony comprises of exchange of finger rings to mark their engagement. A yellow colored outfit is presented by the grooms family and is worn by the girl that evening during the ceremony accompanied by sweets and floral garlands. The Manjay Ceremony
The Baraat Procession
The Nikah Ceremony ( wedding)
The Jalwa Ceremony After the Nikah is completed, Dates and other dry fruits are distributed, refreshments are served to celebrate the validity of the nikah. The Groom then is guided to the ladies section where he is made to sit near the bride and one long scarf is placed over both their heads covering them both. Short Prayer from the holy Quran is recited and a mirror is placed in between both of them to see each other in the mirror as a beginning. Both of them then receive blessings of elders and others present.
RUKHSAT ( Send off ceremony)
On arrival at the grooms home, The holy Quran is held over the bride’s head as both of them step in, this is normally done by the mother-in-law holding it over and walking in tandem, the groom follows behind. This is an auspicious entry of the new Bride in her new home. |
Telugu
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The Telugu Wedding The Telugu Wedding is performed according to the normal Hindu Rituals and can be done in any month of the year except, the three inauspicious months of Aashad, Bhadrapad and The Shunyaa. The marriage is defined as a sacred step towards one’s deep spiritual growth. A Telugu wedding has a more religious definition than just a contract. Once married, the wife is defined as a part of the husband, Ardhangini (Half the body). The parents of the Boy and the Girl play an active part in searching for a nice and suitable alliance for their wards. Once they make their right selection, they take into confidence their children’s acceptance to the choice and proceed to get them engaged. The Engagement ceremony The Boy accompanied by his parents and few very close relatives goes to the Girl’s house. The girl’s parents receive the Boy and welcome him inside. Rings are exchanged. The girl receives a set of new clothes and other gifts such as fruits and sweets and silver anklets. The Boy is gifted with a new set of clothes and sweets. Feast is arranged for everyone present. A Brahmin is invited for deciding the convenient Muhurtam (Auspicious date and time for marriage). The Boy and the Girl are anointed with turmeric paste and oil in a ceremony called the Pendlikuthuru, followed by another function called the Snakatham, in which the Boy adorns a silver thread. The Boy and the Girl take an auspicious bath called the Mangala Snanam and the Girl performs the Gauri Puja (Prayers). The Ganesh Puja (prayers) are then performed for the coming ceremonies to go on smoothly without any mishaps or obstacles. The Wedding During the Wedding ceremony the girl and the Boy arrive at the place and amidst the chants and hymns the marriage is initiated with the father of the girl doing the Kanyadaan (The handing over of the girl to the Boy for marriage). A paste called the Jeelakarra Bellamu (Zeera and Jaggery) is applied to the hands of the Boy and the Girl. The girl wears on a new saree and the boy puts on a white dhoti, this is called the Madhuparkam. The girl is supported and waited upon by a minimum of five married women during the process. The Groom ties a necklace to the bride called the Mangal Sutra. This symbolizes the marriage. The couple exchange floral garlands and the elders bless them after which the Boy and the Girl go around the holy fire seven times. This ceremony is called the Saptapadi. The Boy then puts on toe rings on the Girl’s toes. These rings are made of silver. amidst prayers and chants , the wedding concludes. The new Bride accompanied by her Groom leave for their home and the Girl sets her foot in the house with a ceremony called the Griha Pravesham (Auspicious Entry). |
Tamil
The Tamil Wedding
The alliance in a Tamil family is usually referred by the family priests. The priests are invited to the Boy’s place to finalize the date for the marriage. The Boy and the Girl are not supposed to meet each other till other ceremonies are performed. One day before the wedding, the Boy goes to the Girl’s place amidst enjoyment and fanfare. This is called the janavasam.
The Engagement Ceremony
The engagement ceremony takes place in a ring exchanging ceremony which is followed by Ganesh Puja (prayer) for good and auspicious progress of the ceremonies to come.
The Wedding
Early on the day of the wedding the Prospective Groom and the Prospective Bride have an auspicious bath called the Mangala Snaanam. The wedding is initiated amidst Hymns and chants of holy prayers. The Boy and the Girl exchange garlands of flowers three times. The maternal uncles of both the Boy and the Girl help them and assist them in the process. A ceremony called the Unjal, in which the girl and the Boy are made to sit in a swing follows the rituals. The Groom and the Bride are provided with a mixture of milk with sugar and banana by the relatives present. The girl is given a cocoanut. She is next given a saree to wear, which she adorns and returns to the side of the groom and the process of Kanyadaan (handing over of the Girl) commences. The father of the Bride performs the Kanyadaan. The Bride and the Groom then go around the sacred fire seven times in a Holy ritual called the saptapadi. The most important is the Sacred necklace called the thaali, which is tied around the neck of the girl to symbolize marriage by the groom. The wedding concludes with the people coming forward to bless the newly weds and proceed for the feast.
That evening, the newly wedded couple are given cocoanut to play with and this fun ceremony is called the Nalangu. Flower petals are showered on the couple and the families exchange gifts and other articles in a ceremony called the Laja Homam and Paladaanam.
The Grih Pravesh (Auspicious Entry)
The Grih Pravesh is an auspicious entry ceremony welcoming the new Bride in her husband’s house where she will spend her life with husband.
Sindhi
Sindhi Traditional Wedding
A Sindhi Wedding is very traditional with many cultural values involved. The parents play an important part in searching for a suitable alliance for their son or daughter. There are certain Pandits or holy men ( called the Mehraj ) who specialize in forwarding good matches and references. Horoscopes are checked to see the compatibility. Once The match has been identified the boy goes over to the girls place with his parents to see if he likes the girl and finds her suitable to him and vice versa, paving the way for the next step for a formal acceptance ceremony.
The Kachchi Misri or Kachcha Shagun ceremony
This ceremony is a pre-engagement ceremony where the girl and the boy are given rock sugar (Misri) and coconut as a token of them to have accepted to belong to the opposite families. This is the Kachchi Misri ceremony also known as the Kachcha Shagun. Ten days before the marriage date, a Satsang (ceremony of prayer) dedicated to the Sindhi God Jhulelal is performed. This is an optional ceremony and is called the Berana and it signifies the initiation for forthcoming wedding ceremonies.
The Engagement Ceremony (Pakki Misri)
The Pakki Misri ceremony is the formal engagement ceremony which is normally held about one week before the wedding date. In a get together of family, close relatives and close friends, The prospective Groom and the Prospective Bride exchange rings, gifts and sweets.
The Mehndi (Henna) ceremony
Amidst folk songs and traditional songs , the Mehndi ( Hena) ceremony follows where the Girl is decorated and applied with beautiful patterns and designs of Mehndi.
The Wanvas
An event called the Wanvas is held, the Boy and the Girl are made to wear old clothes and once the ceremony is over, they discard them. These are later packed in a bag and thrown in a nearby river or sea.
The Santh ceremony
The Santh ceremony is performed one night before the wedding date. It comprises of married woman numbering seven coming to the girls place and putting oil on the girl’s head. The girl then is made break the cover of a pot made of earthen mud. This she has to break in one go. It is considered as a good sign if she succeeds.
The Groom celebrates a last bachelors’ party at his place and so does the Girl, by throwing a party where her girl friends are invited, called the ladies sangeet.
This evening a beautiful ceremony called the Saagri is conducted and the Girl is showered with lots of flowers. A married sister of the Boy accompanied with small children and other close cousins go to the Girl’s place taking with them floral jewelry made of white flowers called the Mogra flower. These sisters and cousins first dress the Girl in a lovely silk saree and then adorn her with the floral jewelry that they had brought.
Further in the night The Boy visits the Girl’s place and he is welcomed and garlanded followed by a nice feast. This is in response to the floral blessings that were showered on the Girl.
The Wedding
A Series of many Traditional Rituals and ceremonies are held on the wedding day. At the house of the Boy a thread ceremony is performed which is compulsive for marriage. In earlier days the thread ceremony was conducted the moment the Boy reached adolescence, but now it is mostly preferred being done just before marriage. The Boy is applied with oil and Haldi (turmeric paste) to his hair and his body, and after this he stays indoors and leaves only for the wedding process. A brother of the prospective Bride holding a knife sits next to him symbolizing a protector. The Girl too undergoes the Haldi and oil process and she too stays indoors and should not go out of the house except for the wedding ceremony. The wedding is conducted in a temple or a marriage hall. The Boy and the Girl come to the wedding place and sit down. A sheet of cloth is held between them so that they do not see each other till the proceedings progress. The Boy and the Girl are made to place their feet in a plate. The Girl’s mother washes their feet with milk and the Pandit (the Priest) begins the holy prayers and chants. The sheet separating the two is removed and the couple go around the sacred fire seven times. This ceremony is conducted as per the Vedic rites (certain ancient traditional rites)
The Datar Ceremony
The last of the rituals in the Sindhi wedding consists of the Datar ceremony in which, when the Bride comes to her new home at the Groom’s place she opens the door and sprinkles milk over the house in different corners and places salt in her In-Laws’ hands and the salt is returned to her back. This signifies that a salt will mix in other things to become invisible and becomes part of the entire mixture and so does the bride, shall mix herself well with all the members of her new family and live happily, thus with this Datar ceremony, conclude all the wedding rites.
